i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
wtf?
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
Randomize
