Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
He peed my bed and tried to say it was just the wine. The red wine. On white sheets. He's not a good liar.
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
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