we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The tryst?
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
Randomize
