i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
I projectile vomited into my sink. Jealous?
Kind of. My puke would have just dribbled down my chin and missed the sink completely.
Ohh that happened after I started to cry.
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
Randomize
