i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
I'm going to get so drunk tonight, I actually feel bad about the 30 seconds of drunken awkward sex I'm going to have with one lucky fat chick.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
It's such a good feeling to send those "I'm not in jail" texts on Sunday morning
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
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