Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
Do you realize that we tried to rent a limo at 5am to come and take us to waffle house?
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
This power is too much for most humans to handle safely. It's like having the nuclear launch codes, except it's my penis.
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
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