Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
I told her I'd give her some of the cream I was using so she didn't get my warts. That's when I realized I was too drunk.
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
Randomize
