I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
Dunno why I keep hitting snooze. It's never gonna give me the kind of sleep I need to be sober.
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
Randomize
