Successfully pulled the houdini tonight. Check that off my list.
i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
Woke up this morning naked, wrapped in a bath mat with a wad of singles on the table. I'm calling it a win.
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
hurry up. it's a friday night and i'm drinking in my office by myself. wearing a stewie griffin costume. the cleaning lady is judging me.
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
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