I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
I mean technically the bite was both in my nose and on the outside of it. I thought I was going to need stitches or something.
Why was his mouth around your nose anyways?
It was just one of those nights, man.
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
Randomize
