no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
Also, i'm pretty sure i've had my birth control pill stuck in my throat since like...two pm. So i'll be practicing safe oral sex tonight.
lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
I know her cup size but not her name....
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
Randomize
