i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
Randomize