yo i stole a wine glass from the ritz but i spilled wine on my hundo dolla shirt
your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
Women are like Alzheimers patiens. You can compliment them a million times in a day, but the next day is always a wash, you have to start all over.
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
Your drunk self managed to not pee on anyone's bed
Go me
I'm actually proud
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
Randomize