I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
I'm ordering a French maid costume for my dog too. It's like a couples costume, except for losers with dogs.
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
Uhm... Found a ziploc bag... In the freezer. Sam, thought it was lemonade. Why did you make frozen piss at my house, again?
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Randomize
