Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
Don't try to dry clothes in the microwave. They'll catch on fire.
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
She got turned on by my fanny pack full of condoms. I can't believe you said it was a bad idea to wear it to the party.
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
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