this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
So mom called me from the hospital laughing her ass off. Apparently my sister is allergic to cocaine...
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
He is farting the alphabet right now. In the goddamned restaurant. You don't get to recommend men anymore. Or restaurants for that matter.
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