You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
I saw a sign that said worlds largest frying pan next exit. Way to do your fucking part Iowa.
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
why are there beer bottles in my dishwasher?
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
I just realized that with the new snapchat update / emoji sticker thing I can now use easily use emojis to cover my boobs in nudes.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Randomize
