we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
I'm at about main and main street
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
