butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
Every time I type "should" my phone autocorrects to "shouldn't". even my phone knows my ideas are terrible.
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
My brothers dog was hit by a car and died. They're really sad about it.
But they're having a baby! It's like a dog only 40 billion times worse!
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
Randomize
