dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
you really are a gigantic fucking slut.
sidenote: just remembered sarcasm does not translate through text
it's probably a bad thing that i wasn't even offended, huh?
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
You totally left a blue butt print on our banister
Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time.
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
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