Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
None of these texts make sense. except for "step 2.5 equals velociraptor." that i get.
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
Randomize
