There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
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