Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
Randomize