That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
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