Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
He's doing the 1:45AM lap: he goes around the bar, finds the hottest crying girl 15 minutes before close, and brings her home. I would feel bad for the girls if it wasn't such incredible genius.
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
how do you play pong handcuffed?
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
Randomize
