We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
I almost had to fight a bird, and you know how scared I am of birds. It found that Percocet that I lost in the grass last week, I threw out my back when I launched myself at that little fucker.
No, it's cool, I just bounced from the hospital. I was...talking to a security guard, maybe?
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
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