I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
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he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
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