I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
Went up to some dude that hit on Laura and told him he has a voice like a grandma. Apparently didnt have muscles or kindness like grandma so can you pick me up at the ER please?
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
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