O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
just saw a midget ride a motorized cooler into the liquor store. i'm gonna follow him home.
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
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