just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
If I was doing exactly what I wanted right now I would be getting fucked on a jet ski while listening to "When Love Takes Over" by Kelly Rowland while eating french fries.
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
I told you I couldn't sleep because of the speed and you rolled over and replied "shh. just pretend."
Randomize
