One girl and one boy is just not enough.
Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
On the way out the door to work grabbed the wine glass on the floor left for the ghost of Elijah and chugged it. PASSOVER.
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
A part of me realizes this is a bad time to text. But I override it with my awesomeness
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
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