Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
Randomize