Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
His phone started ringing when we were pulled over and he said 'hold on, this is most likely more important than you', proceeded to answer it and agree to work sunday, then hung up, looked at the cop and told him to continue.
I wonder how horrible I look to customers. There's cuts all over my face and I can't talk.
What are the cuts from? Head-butting the bathroom light fixture?
Honestly that's best case scenario.
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
