grandma shit on top of the toilet
dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
dude you were so wasted last night you ate a sandwich made out of tomatos, cheese, doritos, salt & pepper. Then you heated it in the micro for 5 min to melt the cheese.
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
How am I still drunk? Whoever said breakfast is the most important meal obviously didn't skip dinner and go drinking.
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
Randomize
