I'm at subway, this 8 year old kid is judging my fashion sense with his dad. I want to kill myself.
It's ok, he's just 8, he's not judging you.
He just asked why I'm sitting alone. I honestly want to cry.
One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
she was so hammered she started drinking dishwasher detergent
I dont know whats funnier - that, or that we learned that poison control is closed at 2 AM
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
Ur keys r in ur purse. ur purse is on the couch. ur cigs r on ur front seat. u drank all ur wine. mollie took ur jkt bc u cockblocked her. and in case anyone asks, the saints won 31-17.
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
My mom asked me if I ever go on dates. I had to suppress the urge to ask if having casual sex with a freshmen counts as dating
I just soaked a sugar cookie in nail polish remover to clean off my nails because I was too lazy to walk to the bathroom to get a cotton ball. Is this what rock bottom feels like?
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
Decided to smoke a bowl in my closet while my parents are gone. Just sat in the closet because I couldn't remember how to get out. Started panicking cuz I thought they were gonna show up... Checked my phone. It's been 4 minutes.
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
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