you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
dude your girlfriend is running naked down the hall with a raw chicken taped to her stomach saying this is what I'll look like pregnant...run far far away
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
I had to explain to my dentist that my tooth was chipped because we designated my mouth as the official way to open beer. I feel like our level of partying is no longer socially acceptable.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
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