Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
its liver damage thursday
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize
