if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
There are bud lights poping out of the zipper of my overnight bag and my dildo almost fell out in the elevator. not professional
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
You tried to lick the lightbulb and fell off of the chair onto my wife and gave her a concussion. Did i mention you were naked?
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