OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
dude, i think i am in a porno. I was working out at the hotel gym and some chick was doing yoga and a guy comes up and says "good, now i know your flexible" then they started making out. WTF?
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
Oh god our sink is a cavalcade of horrors. Brb sacrificing a goat and putting everything in the dishwasher forever
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
Randomize
