don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
Let's get this straight. I am six fucking feet tall. Do you even understand how limited my options in guys to date are? No. Did you see my last three boyfriends? I looked like a fucking giant next to them. So I will fuck this six-foot-seven Italian model even if I am the ugliest girl at this party because, goddammit, I deserve to.
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
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