there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
Hey man, when I left for work she was laying on the couch naked cuddling your keurig, can you clean that mess up?
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
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