i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
Randomize
