hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
Someone shattered a urinal.
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
It's not Christmas until you get a photo from an ex wearing a Santa hat and red boxers... And then you just respond with, "nope."
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
