are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
Some nights you do cocaine till 5:00 in the morning, and the next night you teach yourself how to crochet. It’s called balance.
Randomize
