Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
what is it with giant penises always finding me
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
Found trail of ibuprofen on ground. I'm like the intervention version of e.t.
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
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