I hope I'm pregnant just to spite you.
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
Randomize
