weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
masturbating while the coffee brews is the new power nap
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
Randomize
