all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
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