I just made out with a guy for $7.
this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
i actually looked down at my cock today and said "whoa buddy, you need a haircut....(grimace) and a shower"
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
He picked me up went to throw me on his bed. I landed on the wood frame. That's how I broke my rib. We still fucked. Thanks tequila. Best injury ever
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
Randomize
