at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
I just put Gatorade in my wine, cause electrolytes, you know.
Hey man, when I left for work she was laying on the couch naked cuddling your keurig, can you clean that mess up?
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
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